Autonomy vs. Automaticity: The Importance of Choice in Daily Routines

Much of daily life can be organized around the idea of automaticity. We’re encouraged to build habits so ingrained that we no longer need to think about them—wake up, brush teeth, answer emails, make dinner, repeat. Automaticity is often framed as efficiency: less effort, fewer decisions, and more productivity.

But for many people, automaticity does not always create ease. In fact, it can quietly erode autonomy, increase internal resistance, and drain meaning from daily activities. Striving towards efficiency, productivity or creating the perfect system may actually be bypassing human need for choice, autonomy and freedom.

What Is Automaticity—and Why It’s Not Neutral

Automaticity refers to doing tasks without conscious engagement. While this can reduce cognitive load for some, it assumes a nervous system that tolerates repetition, predictability, and externally imposed structure without friction. There is a balance to be struck between healthy habits that create ease and predictability, and engaging in routines that are rigid, gruelling and inflexible that can lead to attrition of the desired goal.

For neurodivergent individuals—particularly those with ADHD—automaticity can feel more like loss of agency than relief. Tasks done “on autopilot” may bypass internal signals about readiness, capacity, sensory comfort, or emotional state.

Over time, this can lead to:

• Chronic resistance or shutdown around routine tasks

• A sense of being controlled by one’s schedule rather than supported by it

• Fatigue that isn’t resolved by rest, because it’s rooted in misalignment rather than effort

The issue isn’t the task itself—it’s how the task is done.

Autonomy as a Nervous System Need

Autonomy isn’t just a philosophical preference; it’s a regulatory need. For many neurodivergent people, having choice directly impacts emotional safety and executive functioning.

Autonomy means:

• Choosing when and how to engage

• Being able to renegotiate routines based on internal state

• Participating rather than complying

When autonomy is present, even mundane activities can feel less burdensome. Without it, the same activities may trigger avoidance, anxiety, or oppositional energy—not because of unwillingness, but because the nervous system is resisting perceived coercion.

Mindful Participation vs. Mindless Repetition

Mindful participation offers a middle path between rigid routines and constant decision fatigue. Rather than asking, “How do I make this automatic?” the question becomes:

“How do I enter this activity with consent and presence?”

This might look like:

• Pausing briefly before a task to check internal readiness

• Naming the purpose of the activity in your own words

• Adjusting the task to meet sensory or energy needs in the moment

• Allowing flexibility without framing it as failure

For example, instead of automatically forcing yourself into a morning routine, you might ask:

• What part of this routine actually supports me today?

• What can be simplified without harm?

• Can I do this in a way that is gentle and matches my current energy?

This kind of mindful engagement often reduces resistance, even if it adds a moment of reflection. The paradox is that honouring autonomy can create more ease than trying to bypass awareness altogether. In those moments when you're wrestling with your inner sense of motivation, check in to see where the resistance lies and if a flexible, gentle and mindful approach allows you to approach the task with more ease.

Meaning Emerges From Choice

Automaticity strips activities of meaning because it removes relationship. Autonomy restores meaning by allowing participation to be intentional rather than obligatory.

When tasks are chosen—even gently, even imperfectly—they become less about discipline and more about alignment. The nervous system is more likely to cooperate when it feels respected.

This doesn’t mean abandoning all structure. It means building routines that are responsive rather than rigid, and allowing yourself to renegotiate daily life as a living system, not a machine.

A Reframe Worth Practicing

Instead of asking:

• How do I get myself to do this automatically?

Try asking:

• How can I meet myself where I am and still move forward?

For neurodivergent individuals, this shift can mean being flexible in how something is done, while still ensuring that participation in the task, activity or goal occurs.

As we enter a new year, consider how engaging in new routines, goals and activities can be done with mindful presence, and with a deeper understanding as to why you're choosing these specific goals. Connecting with autonomy, choice and presence may be the keys to supporting new years resolutions all year long.